a little off today

feeling stressed today.  on edge, needless worry about things that are fine and do not need to be worried about……Not sure why, but I wonder…As I begin to wander back into the world of eating disorder awareness and advocacy, I sense old habits recurring — asking her if shes eaten, studying her face for telltale signs of purging, worrying about drinking.  No, I refuse to roll back into those habits.  they do noone any good — not me and certainly not my daughter…. I certainly hope these obsessive thoughts dont preclude my work in the field of advocacy.  I believe with all my being that i am supposed to be speaking out for sufferers of eating disorders, and their families.  I worry though, hoping that immersing my self in that will be harmful to myself or my daughter.  this is gonna take some working through………


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